Lies

Ever felt what it was like to be cheated on?

I have.

Twice.

There's an old saying that goes by the lines of
"Shame on him if he fools you once. Shame on you if he fools you twice"

The sad part is, I'm anticipating the second deceit.
The first one was done by my ex whom i've been with for 3 and a half to 4 years. He was a sweet guy but it hurts knowing that the "space" meant he got to spend more time with his lecturer's daughter as an R.A.

He had the right to find someone who treated him well because i didn't but he never should have kept me waiting and kept this sneaking around for the whole of 5 months, having me believe I was a terrible person. Who the fuck does that to people?

Oh wait. Me.


I guess Karma came around when this new one lied to me as well. He's a little stupidly good-looking so I'm just sticking around for the blonde hair blue eyes eye candy.

I thought i had developed some real feelings for him, but they keep reeling back. What happened?
Well. When he went back to B., he met this girl name Analmina. (let's stick to this)
They've been talking since before we met and I FUCKING AM CONFIDENT about the fact that he did develop some feelings for her and at the same time, for me.

(I'd like to believe me more because she's an obnoxious 18 year old dumbfuck)
Pardon my language, i'm sure she's sweet. Sweet for dicks and money.

Anyway, he went to meet her, we had an argument and he went to see her and they kissed blabla FUCK whatever.

I'll tell you one thing. He's a damn good liar. Manipulative fucker. Or maybe i just have never been cheated on so I wouldn't know how guys do it.
In the end, my heart broke into pieces and i was determined to break him down really really badly. i think I did manage at one point by being super nice an innocent that everyone turned against him.


But i'm not sure if he's still doing it again. Why? there's nothing on FB, nothing on whatsapp.
I'm not sure about other chat sites. (Viber)

Right now I feel like it's all temporary and it still is. I told him i would not have anymore discussions about future talks. As far as i'm concerned, I'm serious about studies and I will graduate with good grades to get that scholarship and find someone there, iA.

I hope God helps me out along the way, to be patient enough with the struggles that i will face. And i hope he will move my heart again towards prayers.

"I think i need a new life, to leave this all behind"
-My Mantra.

Till then, Bye.