Eat, Pray, Love.

I've faked an account before. But here is where the real story starts.

I came home last night, parking in front of the gate (my spot) as usual, with my cat meowing from inside as i unlocked the door. She is the only one who greets me whenever i come home, in hopes of me giving her food. because i'm the only one who serves it the right way. the way she likes it.

i went upstairs, changed into my PJ's and started working on that page when an hour later my family came home, banging the door because i locked it. i ignored as usual knowing my sister would open it. My brother came up and gave me my car keys for me to move the car. from my spot. i stalled and when i went down dad grabbed the keys from me and moved the car himself. A simple task given and i failed anyway the same way i failed to send emails to other users like "yahoo" or "hotmail" blaming the fact that my email is retarded, knowing that i'm the moron who doesn't know how to work an e-mail. how foolish. i got upset so i tried to cheer myself up with that series show "new girl" and that didn't exactly work because watching videos online you only get the privilege of watching it up to 62 minutes now. without anything else to do i went on youtube. to watch the same debate video i watched previously, knowing that it will put me to sleep. and it did.

The next day i woke up at 12 pm, to an empty house. i was alone. with my cat. she's always there for me. i went downstairs to cook. i don't normally cook but there was nothing else other than instant noodles to eat (i'm on a diet, still deluding myself into thinking i'd be able to look like miranda kerr one day) so i did pasta with carbonara sauce (which was actually mushroom soup) and voila, that was breakfast. surprisingly i managed to finish this one because most of the time after two bites, my cooking goes untouched and into the trash. i went upstairs to watch eat, pray, love and realized how sentimental the movie was and how i felt the same way. Argued with him and now we don't know what to say to each other. i'm going through that "i don't know what to do with my life" phase again.

breakdown;

1. i DONT like the fact that i get so awkward around people lately.

2. i want that to change.

3. being bitchy boosts up my ego. the ego is still there but the bitchyness is near gone. is that a good thing?

4. is shaping myself to look like miranda kerr good? is there a better role model out there that i'd care about?

5. i'm not pretty. i'm not tall. i think i'm smart.